Loss aur Likho apni kahani!

the tale of 'The Lost Faith in Mist of Living True to Yourself'
Join in on the factors of thinking the time shall be on our sides but you will be betrayed. Don’t worry, in this life, you have seen it before and you shall see it again. I am Life and I possess my own death, that I keep on seeping into the main bloodstream. I have aspiration that I cherish till the day I have to kill. These are the sacrifices that I have to make to get by.
What are the perceptions that will have their toll on the grown up; The pressure to be loved, to see your life worth the effort. Now you believe it. What options did you really have?!
The fact is the life is relative under pressure of constant comparison. I have to see my strengths, something beyond SWAT analysis. The reality is not someone’s property but you and I have to buy one’s own reality, on a lease. The day you lose your confidence, is the day you lose your reality. Try to get a new one, in this ever changing world.
I for most, have to look at what I do best. Kindda where have I spent most of my time… worrying, over-thinking… cant get a career out of them can i?!! But I, in silence, can work on the professional skill and expertise, with the literature I bought out of excitement.

All in all, I have the opportunity to live a life no one can afford to live. The life of a stoic. Now, I am not talking of the real selfless one, more like the one who has no other option, it is the hypocritical option. Bahi apna level hi bohat high hai, aur apni league to championship hai aur apni khawahish premier league ki Norwich whose preference is that of the standard of Manchester United or Liverpool.
While you prepare, you don’t have a warranty, life can shake and stir at any time, go out into thin air, disappear – WHOSSHH – gone! Just like that!
So dude! Apni tou life ki watt lag giye hai! Kiya bananay nikalay thay aur kidher aah gaye…
The jack of most trades has to stick to his survival and grab hold of his attention span. Work his way out the midlife blues, and I am not even married yet and people so easily get on my nerves lately. Better get more sleep from now onwards.
This or that …. The English team is out of Euro as expected. Proud of this remorse over the inability English football team’s of achieving its potential, much like the reflection of my own life... Aab tou aadat si hai m******* ki!
DAMN LOSS!!
And as far as current political instability, home and away, is concerned, I hate talking politics nowadays, either I am too aware now of my awareness or my dumbness or both! Or the world is too much of a beautiful chaos!
So my friend, enjoy life while you can.
P.s. dil ki darkan say likho apni kahani… jhoomo reh … hahaha … Noori song on the air!

Report Card aur Ramazan!

Excitement in life is like McDonald's cheesy potatoes balls.. at first it seems all-tasty cheese filled crumcoat, but 3 to 4 bites down they loose the impact and taste like nothing but meshed potato.
Just gave one more bit of my exams, yet again. But I am not here to talk about the remorse of the same old shitty experience that one feels like running away from. What I am going to talk about is what it did to me. 

I am not opportunity-less man. I am bloody high on being lucky and near escapes. But to me its about getting to my potential, its more of what comes from the package of individuality, and not giving a fu*k about what the crowd identifies itself as or with.

My ever changing perception, evolved once again. Learning: Life is not about this shit or that shit, its the food mess where you always get served. So, you better develop a taste, or just get to extremes of liking food at highs and hating it on lows. It wont give you either pain or comfort, it will be what it is. 

You live in a world constructed to be at peace, but is growing intolerant ever since. Its a regression to towards the nature; miser, selfish and violent. So, if I feel passionate to save lives, it seems noble to me, especially, where life is about grabbing the objects that you fancy. To die, live and then die, for them, is all that takes over. 

In this overcrowded, intolerant and insecure society, which is at the same time compassionate, resilient and family-oriented, we are herd of desperate animals rebelling against each other. We want heaven and earth, all to ourselves, while we don't know shit.  

As, I discussed vehemently in my previous blogs.. now its proven that Pakistan's biggest obsession is MARRIAGE... getting an opportunity to consummating marriage, get hell bent on saving it in the long run and in the end, brag about cherishing its frights e.g. status of being a 'responsible' member of society, etc.

But my goal here is try to understand the bigger picture. 

Firstly, one derives strength from ones' race, gender, social and financial status of your parents, ethnic background and infrastructure around. Then secondly, the factors leading toward the kind of education you get from the schools and universities deemed fit for oneself, the 'Iyashi' opportunities one can afford, and then the two acting upon each other for the kind of job you wish to find. Alas, you are inhibited by the society due to their set norms and perceptions, your monetary restraints and life itself, with its mysterious serving of the same-shit-every-now-and-then. Thirdly comes, the epitome of one's life, the report card of your life, the thing! FAMILY, initially you have to get married to have one of your own!! work to keep it, and fill it with children, while you can and at the end get away with the credit of having 'the great learning'.

Feminism, an important part of today's culture, I hail it! though it was chained and shackled by one's personal and family reputation, prospects of harassment,  and opposition from our indigenous traditions. While the men on the other side, were facing lesser evils of falling in to inferior company of lesser intellects, drug access, immorality, and physical beating as a result of being overly expressive. Though, both girls and boys, can still decide, to great extent toward their education and job, but they don't get a 1/3 of that support when it comes to marriage. This is how grave it gets. And if ever you are none compliant, you are dead!

Now, sitting in this wicker chair, sipping my americano that tastes like a jalli-huwi coffee, still managing to make it up with the bitterness that I as of recently related to my life, is what life is serving tonight anyway. I for now will keep on pushing to improve my life and my understanding, so should anyone enlighten enough to realize all this, should too.Though, its Ramazan, I do wish for a pakora, but the coffee house is too cool for that, wonder what life thinks!

p.s. Saal kay 11 mahenay hum coffee pay nahi aisay martay, jese iss ramazan kay mahenay mein hum aik Pakoray par martay hai!!