Wednesday, December 28, 2016

Biosafety aur Bimaar!


First Information Report for the desk of Intellectual Police Station biosafety branch subcontinent.

Recently an increasing spread has been observed of an endemic. The highly contagious strain of multi-book resistant Inferiomonas complexia,and Superiomonas complexia is spreading in full swing, yet again in the local population. The symptoms from the prevalence of this infectious disease are, holding of core desi clich├ęs as personal views, such as

  • If a woman is 30 or a man is 36, and unmarried! They have wasted human machinery and not served one sole purpose of their life!
  • A girl is born to cook, clean, get a rich husband, 4 kids! Repeat!
  • Real man does not use lotion.
  • Mard ko dard nahi hota!
  • Sab contrupt hai, bas aik hum theek hai
  • Conspiracy, Conspiracy, Conspiracy, the world is conspiring against our holy cow of a tradition.
  • Meray saat bohat nainsafi howi hai!
  • Yeh sab paisay ki game hai!
  • Piece bara tait hai!
  • Aslam sahab jaisa bara sa bangla hona zarori hai, iss liye apnay bachoun ko sarkari school mein parha kar bachat karo
  • Yaar uski/uska dosti kitni/kitna HOT hai!! 'kash!?' makes a mental note
  • That peon's son must be so jealous of my 21 grade father's fortune and fate!
  • Agar uss nay Agha Noor say aik jora liya hai to mein dou lou gi
  • I am praise worthy, worship me when at rest and applaud me when in action Etc..

The predisposing factors include a well read English medium educated masters degree holding human, of whom education was not able to disconcert the desi patriotic-ky pessimism. Differential diagnosis include two faced person syndrome, dual standarhiea, and snake feel. Currently, there are no available indigenous treatment guidelines and there is an unavailability of cure, too. Thus, one with a sane mind and a bright future should practice preventive measures by staying out of the reach of such super bugs. You can encounter such a case, at home as well as abroad, so be careful and stay safe. 

p.s. so jahan bhi aisa bimaar insan millay.... wahan say zinda bhaag jao! Because, though, you can’t always get what you want, but you definitely can get Inferiomonas complexia or Superiomonas complexia, even if you don’t want to.

Thursday, December 22, 2016

Life aur Log!

somewhere on earth, in memory of those who thought about their rights

In sickness, a man can be transported to his childhood. Wrapped, immobile and stuck to his chair. And when life hands him sickness, he writes while hearing to atomic by blondie. He reflects on this year, the greatest year of his blogging and reading, till date.
The life from the view of maturity of past three decades has taught me no wisdom. I have watched more than what I can understand. Met more people than I could bear. And failed more than I ever wished to sustain. The world is messier by the day, as it passes and my observation gets fits.
Religion, science and philosophy, have failed not due to their incapacity but due to the fear of change and love for ignorance, of the mankind. We are still barbarians dressed in expensive clothes at our convenience. The acts are nothing but tools for self preservation. And in that I have failed miserably. I have constructed the one of the most incompatible human of myself in this land of the pure. The hope of my salvation may be beyond the saints of the holy. But I know, that I don't know. Logic has annihilated all pleasures, yet my snow capped barren lands are soaked in dreams of them.
As for the Noah's arc, well there is no doubt (99% statistically speaking) that it is doomed. With the current gene pool and its inability to understand the prospects of technology change with its short attention span, is like a wedge, meant to be hit at ones own feet. Individuals are losing what they never had. Through the past centuries we have improvised our own disaster.
Life is .... what you define it to be. You can divorce everything from your life except for the world that affects it. And house always wins. Losing is the only constant(plus drugs, prescription and non-prescribed) unless you are not too feely neely about it. But life is definitely not love! neither a carrot! those definitions just makes the world more obsessive. Probably life is close to a charity, where you get looted by default.
Truth is we all are children till the very end. The relativity, is in the hope that we are robbed off, by our own knowledge. In sickness and in health, for better or worse, for all worlds out here and there, misery, is a beauty, try appreciating it, may be its the life. The status quo of preconceived principles of man and woman society is a bogus lie. You will die for nothing from newtonian education system of school to university, the newer world's working and earning, reproducing and breeding those offsprings, all just to prepare to die in the end because it is a lie! This world is a chaos and will  always be. And there is no such thing as winning! the world pays and wins! mankind just dies.
And while I end, I am listening to Time to pretend by MGMT, you can go traveling the world watching some cradle groined hemispherical painted marble quadripartite vault arches made to commemorate those who sacrificed their lives to think. What an irony! Where is wisdom?

p.s. Here are a few verses from poetry of Munir Niazi:
Kuj ounj vi rawa okhiya saan
Kuj gallan vich gaum da touq vi ci
Kuj shehr dey log vi zalim saan
Kuj sanu vi marn da shouq vi ci

Tuesday, December 6, 2016

Sentiments aur Sarkar!

This is an addendum to the previous published post at Nation Blog (http://nation.com.pk/blogs/17-Nov-2016/being-concerned-about-the-working-middle-and-lower-classes-on-both-sides-of-the-border-is-not-a)

Later, in essence of the continuation of this war on poverty especially, India boycotted SAARC summit on 'ANTI-CORRUPTION' along Afghanistan! to their own convenience. As if South Asia was about to audit their french war plane deal. While, interestingly Pakistan planned attending 'Heart of Asia' Conference in India, as to ensure none is left, which ironically is on Afghanistan. And none of the parties were disappointed (pun intended)  
Source; Samaa.tv
Banning films here and having film-stars banned in India is not some knee jerk reaction but indicator for lack of foresight. Two months ago, the previously infamous film 'Ae dil hai muskil' got release in Indian cinema. Last month, 'Dear Zindagi' got its release, featuring Ali Zafar, with one of his most commendable performance. And next month, 'Raees' is due for a release, featuring Mahira Khan, so, as they say third time's a charm, who knows! (peace may get a leg broken till then)  The fiasco surrounding these films, perfectly hint at the hypocrisy and shallowness of cultural policies of both countries. The 6% Indian content on Radio services and Indian films in cinemas are voluntarily banned by Pakistani Authorities and Associations alike, as a reciprocation of the announcement by Indian Film makers for banning Pakistani artists and refusal to further work with them in future. The rhetoric behind it is, the 'larger interest of the sentiments of the people' (as if they ever cared, till it hits the profits). Art and education are tools for peace, thus, should never be hung on walls!

Source: IndianExpress.com

Recent skirmishes on border changed newsrooms into war rooms! As the profits are to be scavengered in times when peace is most needed. I only hope that the drama that runs on general media and social media is taken as such and not as impulse for adverse action by the men at helm.
And let me reemphasize! I am standing for the common man that suffers on both sides of the border and has suffered because of this decayed 70 years of nationalistic jingoism by both states! Its time to get over it!

P.s. Ab Ki Baar Aman Sarkar!! 

Heart wreck aur Bardast!

Today while I sit in front of my laptop, I don’t think of the stress related to work, jeopardies of studies or pending tasks back at hom...