Wednesday, December 28, 2016

Biosafety aur Bimaar!

First Information Report for the desk of Intellectual Police Station biosafety branch subcontinent.

Recently an increasing spread has been observed of an endemic. The highly contagious strain of multi-book resistant Inferiomonas complexia,and Superiomonas complexia is spreading in full swing, yet again in the local population. The symptoms from the prevalence of this infectious disease are, holding of core desi clichés as personal views, such as

  • If a woman is 30 or a man is 36, and unmarried! They have wasted human machinery and not served one sole purpose of their life!
  • A girl is born to cook, clean, get a rich husband, 4 kids! Repeat!
  • Real man does not use lotion.
  • Mard ko dard nahi hota!
  • Sab contrupt hai, bas aik hum theek hai
  • Conspiracy, Conspiracy, Conspiracy, the world is conspiring against our holy cow of a tradition.
  • Meray saat bohat nainsafi howi hai!
  • Yeh sab paisay ki game hai!
  • Piece bara tait hai!
  • Aslam sahab jaisa bara sa bangla hona zarori hai, iss liye apnay bachoun ko sarkari school mein parha kar bachat karo
  • Yaar uski/uska dosti kitni/kitna HOT hai!! 'kash!?' makes a mental note
  • That peon's son must be so jealous of my 21 grade father's fortune and fate!
  • Agar uss nay Agha Noor say aik jora liya hai to mein dou lou gi
  • I am praise worthy, worship me when at rest and applaud me when in action Etc..

The predisposing factors include a well read English medium educated masters degree holding human, of whom education was not able to disconcert the desi patriotic-ky pessimism. Differential diagnosis include two faced person syndrome, dual standarhiea, and snake feel. Currently, there are no available indigenous treatment guidelines and there is an unavailability of cure, too. Thus, one with a sane mind and a bright future should practice preventive measures by staying out of the reach of such super bugs. You can encounter such a case, at home as well as abroad, so be careful and stay safe. 

p.s. so jahan bhi aisa bimaar insan millay.... wahan say zinda bhaag jao! Because, though, you can’t always get what you want, but you definitely can get Inferiomonas complexia or Superiomonas complexia, even if you don’t want to.

Thursday, December 22, 2016

Life aur Log!

somewhere on earth, in memory of those who thought about their rights

In sickness, a man can be transported to his childhood. Wrapped, immobile and stuck to his chair. And when life hands him sickness, he writes while hearing to atomic by blondie. He reflects on this year, the greatest year of his blogging and reading, till date.
The life from the view of maturity of past three decades has taught me no wisdom. I have watched more than what I can understand. Met more people than I could bear. And failed more than I ever wished to sustain. The world is messier by the day, as it passes and my observation gets fits.
Religion, science and philosophy, have failed not due to their incapacity but due to the fear of change and love for ignorance, of the mankind. We are still barbarians dressed in expensive clothes at our convenience. The acts are nothing but tools for self preservation. And in that I have failed miserably. I have constructed the one of the most incompatible human of myself in this land of the pure. The hope of my salvation may be beyond the saints of the holy. But I know, that I don't know. Logic has annihilated all pleasures, yet my snow capped barren lands are soaked in dreams of them.
As for the Noah's arc, well there is no doubt (99% statistically speaking) that it is doomed. With the current gene pool and its inability to understand the prospects of technology change with its short attention span, is like a wedge, meant to be hit at ones own feet. Individuals are losing what they never had. Through the past centuries we have improvised our own disaster.
Life is .... what you define it to be. You can divorce everything from your life except for the world that affects it. And house always wins. Losing is the only constant(plus drugs, prescription and non-prescribed) unless you are not too feely neely about it. But life is definitely not love! neither a carrot! those definitions just makes the world more obsessive. Probably life is close to a charity, where you get looted by default.
Truth is we all are children till the very end. The relativity, is in the hope that we are robbed off, by our own knowledge. In sickness and in health, for better or worse, for all worlds out here and there, misery, is a beauty, try appreciating it, may be its the life. The status quo of preconceived principles of man and woman society is a bogus lie. You will die for nothing from newtonian education system of school to university, the newer world's working and earning, reproducing and breeding those offsprings, all just to prepare to die in the end because it is a lie! This world is a chaos and will  always be. And there is no such thing as winning! the world pays and wins! mankind just dies.
And while I end, I am listening to Time to pretend by MGMT, you can go traveling the world watching some cradle groined hemispherical painted marble quadripartite vault arches made to commemorate those who sacrificed their lives to think. What an irony! Where is wisdom?

p.s. Here are a few verses from poetry of Munir Niazi:
Kuj ounj vi rawa okhiya saan
Kuj gallan vich gaum da touq vi ci
Kuj shehr dey log vi zalim saan
Kuj sanu vi marn da shouq vi ci

Tuesday, December 6, 2016

Sentiments aur Sarkar!

This is an addendum to the previous published post at Nation Blog (

Later, in essence of the continuation of this war on poverty especially, India boycotted SAARC summit on 'ANTI-CORRUPTION' along Afghanistan! to their own convenience. As if South Asia was about to audit their french war plane deal. While, interestingly Pakistan planned attending 'Heart of Asia' Conference in India, as to ensure none is left, which ironically is on Afghanistan. And none of the parties were disappointed (pun intended)  
Banning films here and having film-stars banned in India is not some knee jerk reaction but indicator for lack of foresight. Two months ago, the previously infamous film 'Ae dil hai muskil' got release in Indian cinema. Last month, 'Dear Zindagi' got its release, featuring Ali Zafar, with one of his most commendable performance. And next month, 'Raees' is due for a release, featuring Mahira Khan, so, as they say third time's a charm, who knows! (peace may get a leg broken till then)  The fiasco surrounding these films, perfectly hint at the hypocrisy and shallowness of cultural policies of both countries. The 6% Indian content on Radio services and Indian films in cinemas are voluntarily banned by Pakistani Authorities and Associations alike, as a reciprocation of the announcement by Indian Film makers for banning Pakistani artists and refusal to further work with them in future. The rhetoric behind it is, the 'larger interest of the sentiments of the people' (as if they ever cared, till it hits the profits). Art and education are tools for peace, thus, should never be hung on walls!


Recent skirmishes on border changed newsrooms into war rooms! As the profits are to be scavengered in times when peace is most needed. I only hope that the drama that runs on general media and social media is taken as such and not as impulse for adverse action by the men at helm.
And let me reemphasize! I am standing for the common man that suffers on both sides of the border and has suffered because of this decayed 70 years of nationalistic jingoism by both states! Its time to get over it!

P.s. Ab Ki Baar Aman Sarkar!! 

Saturday, November 26, 2016

Idiot aur Idhar!

You know that real feeling, when you feel like an idiot. To do what you should not do but you got to do it. YOU HATE IT! BUT YOU GOT TO DO IT!

It is an existential question, am I alive?  If yes then what is it to be alive, like? Is it the struggles in life or the individual moments that matter more? For me, I am not sure. I don't know what living a life is like. The things people talk about living the life to the fullest, seem like an alien concept. I know, I live in this "world" that is shared with 6 or 7 billion people, and if there is a fate that's hanging in balance then its not just mine. I like to read but pessimistically speaking it does not fill the stomach. More or less, what we ever achieve in our life is more to do with the opportunities we get. Though, the innuendo of choosing between living or struggling is an ambiguous turn of events. The world out there, perceives you by its own standards and I mean people! They can add any adjective to your personality and you can be sensitive about it. Or you can just be sensitive to extension of your own invention, like I am, as in what kind of a son was I suppose to be for my parents? what kind of a profession or class was I suppose to attain for my dreaming childhood?

The other aspect to life is self expression and recognition. By hook or crook, now that you are in this world, what am I suppose to do? Its a little complex from where I see it all. You can either start out as a creative person with inhibitions and impulse, or you can be a follower of the status quo, more like, go with the flow. Though, realistically its a combination of both in bits and pieces. If you are lucky, you can be pragmatic enough to do the right things at the right time.

The major hindrance in the community that I live is, there is no real self-conscience! much of this can be attributed to the competition of overpopulated society where everyone is pushing off the waves so that they, perceptibly, do not sink like a stone. And there is some real lack of intellectual empathy. You have here, basically whats considered as a metaphorical herd of sheep. I myself am clueless, of how to 'be' in this community and thus, truly feel like an idiot! And much of want I do, is mostly what I hate!

Apparently, idhar ka locha hi kuch aur hai! life will end, but truth will be what no one can comprehend.

P.s. So on this lovely Sunday morning, I am leaving you with my creative output and something from truck art, explaining providence destiny, making me feel like an even bigger idiot sitting idhar...
na koi kisi say durr hota hai na koi kisi kay kareeb hota hai
pyar khud chal kar ata jab koi kisi ka naseeb hota hai

Friday, October 28, 2016

Millennials aur Mela!

Disclaimer: I am practicing freedom of speech and I hope the principle may not be departed in interest, violation or instigation of its holy preservations. 
Brief: Word millennials is referred to those born in 80s and 90s

The current government has done a favour to the millennials by a series of actions ever since it came into power. The politics of 90s that gave this profession a bad name, is back! PTI has been acting like it always does and PMLN has shown its draconian colours.
Thanks to General sahib for letting this madness prevail, or else the ruckus by the two would have already brought on a martial law on us, in case of previous tenures.
And the mass media here in this country, as always, is cashing in, with state sponsored advertisement at one end and implication of colluding with the enemy directives on the other end. The news channels have pretty much fallen on their own feet in reporting the 'reality'. And well, the paper news is not any better either. Here is a short Ted talk by a creative thinker, who illustrates how they (media) determine the version of truth for masses and the classes of reporting that are used:

The current crack down to avoid lockdown is not something that could not be foresighted. The fact that last night officials confused section 144 with curfew, has led to inordinate force launched on political workers and instigating a sense of haste and unease. Aur yeh to sirf trailer tha!
I don’t like to revise the claims and blames against PMLN but its not rocket science to see the past and understand the basic nature of decision making at its helm. The 90s government was marred with abuse of power, unconstitutional rule, miscarriage of justice, encroachment on freedom of press, corruptions at high ends, commission and kickbacks in large projects, lies propagated by public offices, anointing plots and special posts, implication with anti-nationals, exploiting of religion, giving air to sectarianism and hatred, devising economic policies leading to default, criminalizing politicians, politicking crime, excessive undue taxation, tax evasion, loan defaulting, excessive life style with palace-like residence, subversion of independent institution like judiciary and press, confused cultural and social policies, and autocrat provincial governance.  So, folks here we go again! or here we are!?!
Another problem is the perception of who is right or who is wrong.
Well the government should have a look at Gali-e-Dastoor and try judging its action. This is the constitution lane recently inaugurated in Parliament symbolizing : ‘important yet most neglected aspects of Pakistan’s history!’. Look at the fountain courtyard that symbolizes the country’s people it’s driving force! And both parties should look at its black patches(symbolizing martial law)  and take a moment to feel the fiascos of past!
So, what do millennials think of all this, in Pakistan?
As millennials in this country, we have seen the dictatorship of Musharraf and the democracy of Zardari and Sharifs. Our generation has not stood up against the military regimes but learned to stand against plutocracy-cum-democracy of autocratic regime. I am not sure if that is the right direction we have taken but it is the de facto we are destined, apparently. What-more, is the comparison of the two, are misleading to the understanding of our ancestors. The modernization and globalization have influenced us more than anything else, to our clerics' dismay.
We are ensorcelled by the definition of infatuation and right to choose marital partners. Our delectation is less associated with our education and more with finding joys in life. We idolize celebrities more and do less critical thinking, to the fancy of this oligarchy. We embrace that corruption is bearable if it suits you and objectionable if it does not favour you! We live in contradictions to the limit that we have become insensitive and indifferent to any injustice if it happens for the second time. This should raise alarm bells for the think-tank, for if the democracy is derailed in any circumstance, millennials might not be on-board to save it! Rather more occupied over their next lunch date!
To the fellow millennials I will admit that personally I hold no moral authority nor I wish to preach, but would request some leverage to remind us that being master of one trade is not worth it in today's world, be jack of most trades and master of few! Pragmatism ftw! Indeed we have been dealt like sheep by our ancestors but don't consider yourselves ready for being butchered! Think! Think! and Think! For what is happening out there is nothing new to the game, but our decipherment of the current scenario is integral for the future generations. We might not be able to apprehend the lance bearers of imbecility but we certainly can avert their progress.
In the view of the recent political tensions, it may not be wrong to say that unfortunately the curtains have fallen on Kashmir.
So how do you perceive these issues, as millennials? Please leave your feedback.
P.s. I will end on verse that I dedicate to fellow millennials for a song of a singer from across the border. Do reflect on it!
Dekho na saja yaha pe mela dil ka
Jin ko zaroori hai ke ho dil ka sauda

Friday, October 21, 2016

Country aur Chai-wala!

We all have listen to the Grimm tale where a princess kisses the frog and turns him into a prince....
Well folks, the social media publicizes 'rags to riches moments' of ordinary people with ordinary lives, and turn them into extraordinary by their own definition of choosing, to play the role of God.
We are getting crazy with this recent Chai-wala aka Hot-tea!

This country needs to find some direction. Initially there was Qandeel Balouch, then Momina Mustehsan and now Arshad Khan. Are they going to be raised to the top, to be sacrificed by some satanic ritual?
The question is that will he be able to handle this new earned fame?
The fact that he is given a modelling contract over a chai-wala past puts in a comparison in the equation. Does this imply that its 'better' to be a model then a hard working tea maker? If yes, then this is a clear case of looking down on other chai-walas and demeaning their profession.
The fact that his 'green' eyes are attractive for the masses, is nothing but an extension of the complexion complex.It is a dangerous precedent for a gold standard per se, and what more but a depiction of a deep rooted eye colour complex held for ages in our society, leading to a much stronger suppression of self expression and building peer pressure to wear lens to go green for the sake of acceptance in a materialistic society.
The social media has proven once again, its mindless mental, where the sheep are led by a wolf-shepherd. A downright insult on the years of education. Education that should have led to a merited judgement and in itself served as a promotion of skilled people as real glamour.
Alas! apparently we are becoming a nation of trolls with nothing substantial to add to social media.
The problem lies with the growing materialism in our society, where we are insecure about our very existence not to just say appearance or pay-checks. The professions are merited on money. This leads to a chain of constant dissatisfaction and ultimately, depression. In a country where 34% of the population is already suffering from depression this is a dangerous trend to follow.
Being a university student I wanted to hear opinions from the bright and eager minds of tomorrow and this is what they had to say:

"Stop creating hype about chai wala, this is simply madness" - Faiqa, Undergrad

"Tumhay momina nahi milni, humain chaiwala nahi milna"' - Nabeeha, Undergrad

"People are wasting their time."- Ali, Undergrad

"Real issues like Kashmir are getting ignored, a chai-wala is getting hype" - Haroon, Undergrad

"Highly disappointed. Social media so badly flooded with this chai wala story! Is this where our country is going man? Since when beauty became talent? Grow up Pakistan!" - Gul e Maryam, Mphil Student

"Media needs an issue for publicity, this is something working in mutual benefit, though not in much sincerity, more like a 15 minutes to fame thingy" - Kamran, PhD scholar

"Poor man is attractive, why are we surprise? We have a multitude of issues in this country which need consideration then someone's green eyes and handsome features" - Junaid, PhD Scholar

In my view, every human being is beautiful but having said that there is no doubt that this current hype is going to go places and much further. Its better to use it to the positive and substantial benefit of the masses, and not to aggravate the prevalent pathos. Time will tell if its, trend or trash!
We should not be vectors of propounding materialistic trends and I am not referring to the class of logical version of materialists by Democritus here! Though, instead of being impertinent, one can always learn from his preference of discovering cause of nature over kingdom of Persia.
P.s. Here at Quaid i Azam University we have our own Bus-wala and Mochi-wala!! Increasing pride in our men or objectifying our men, all in the eyes of the beholder after all! nonetheless deriving glory out of triviality is never a good idea!


Tuesday, October 4, 2016

Classified aur Chill karo!

I am a soul. I have heart. It beats. I am a human. I breathe.
Sitting down under the light on this night, I purge myself off the feel that I get all quite too often.
I am a willfully alone man who has grown accustom to his loneliness.
I am a human and so I believe I am prone to adaptation. At times that adaptation can be against the nature of mankind as well.
These attenuated colloquies have made a culpable persona dependent on complaisance, proving ineffective. Classified into this diabolical person in the eye of my close friends, I too feel like a battledore and shuttlecock in medium of rich stupid. But I restrain myself off this ignis-fatuus, though one may be indocible still one feels like being cowed to such seduction. Indeed at the end of the day there is some element of dolorifuge.
My age is not just a number. Even if it sounds like a cliché, its true. My age is a combination of sad expectations and brutal but just, strikes by the reality. As a result, my age is a soul-engrave-badge of endurance towards letting down of almost everything that I ever kept dear to myself.
I don’t see a point in life, love, money, marriage, children, charm, fame or fortune.
There is this energy in me, that just makes me wonder, if its sacred? May be being up at this time of night, I am forced to exert myself to exertion. May be, the option of going into a sleep is just too comfortable that it irritates me to experience such pleasure.
Surely, I am depressed. Par chill karo yar, some day the forsaken diseases will come and consume me.
May be with no attachments, I am free to be selfishly miserable of all that goes away due to my voluntary inaction. May be this is the adaptation, tailor-made for me. That’s how wisdom numbs the soul off any contagious passion. May be this feeling is the new happiness.
To my friends I am dog in the manger, preaching graveled ode of the forlorn. I see the expression on their faces as if they smell some feigned hawker.
Coddling of their old theories of love and hate is nothing but a lifelong ague, like a legal appanage distributed at birth. Woo the world as if you are some luster on the ceiling. Preceding events will find such insecure in surfeit onto nuisance of necromancy.
So, edict the castrated while they can. But I choose to enforce my will till the very end of the last exhaled breath that spills the soul out of me. I shall not care for what I hold dear to myself, they are nothing but the scars on my face. They mark, not the age but the pains I can experience at a time.
So, while I leave you with this post, there is a change we shall embrace together, our indifference. The abundant shall rule but the oppressed will remain united. Welcome to my life.

Thursday, September 22, 2016

Narcissism aur Nagawar!

Following post is work of satire, done to support our too-overly-proud friends.. we love you!
In this land of pure, you wake up every morning to fight with your fellow countrymen. Kuin kay kahi koi aap ko easy naa lay ley(so that no one takes you for granted) . Your breakfast represent the type of aggression you are going to put up. The mogul in your flesh is gonna put the BBQ on coal to every irritation, as it is some gasoline to fire.  Mind you, we are lesser mortals bearing numerous allergies, many acquired off recent happenings. That means, you can make me laugh on a joke yesterday and offend me for no reason off same joke today. 
Bahi mein dushmandaar banda nahi hou… par har kisi ko meray say koi masla hai(Dude! I am not a someone to put up a fight but everyone seems to have a problem with me). So, is it me or is it you? Everyone out there is in pursuit of holding grudges and get hold of them as soon as possible. At times, I just wonder how can I save myself off such frequent fall from the nazar(grace). Its impossible even if you give up your so-called integrity and be an all out people appeaser. It’s a mine field and you have way too many legs to save.
Every human seems to be like playing God-like size ego. The ambition seems to fall short of eternity of mortality and incapacity to understand the futility of such prowess. Hence, come the rage and the sensitivity to the feeling of failure to derive off authentic praise and respect. Bahi khud bhi zaleel ho aur khuahish dosaro ko zaleel karwanay ki hai(Dude! you are already humiliated and are wishing to get others humiliated as well). So, when your lack of success gets yet another recognition by you, its lunch time. Now, you can eat up your depression, with some oily curry emulsified with herbs and spiced with reality. 
By this time your job timing is off or your classes have ended, or whatever. You, pick up your battered self and look for some consolidation prize but alas, karki pari howi hai(poverty has struck now), times are hard, you are all on your own. 
So now you head home, reflecting on the day's debacles and fall-outs. Sit somewhere that gives you the nostalgic feel. Take a cup of brewed coffee or decocted green tea or milk tea, add some sugar, as per required. Do some self-talk. Make the punctured-flat ego, fat again!
If this is not enough for the narcissism of the day, call a close friend of yours and uss ki ahtema rool dou(shake the hell out of their spirit) by complaining about the 'nothings'. Make them embrace the world from your eye to the point kay uss ko bhi aap ki aaj ki dunya nagawar duzray(even to that person your today's world seem pervasively noxious). 
At last, when you are satisfied with sharing the burns with your society, go to sleep. Wake up to a new morning with the same ambition, belief and ego! The inferior world awaits you! Good luck!
P.s. If the world does not live up to your expectation, then remember this title of an old Pakistani film.. 'very good duniya(earth) very bad loag(people)' make it a tagline of you life... because its not you, its them.

Thursday, September 15, 2016

Honour aur Himakat

A girl who is a daughter, is hope of a family, is the fight of decades, time can be the only historian who can tell what struggles culminate over the period of several years. If you are not in-lined with the lives of the common man you have to understand, life is a strange and bittersweet roller-coaster ride. In there, you shall find, the space for a whirl pool that is constantly in motion, in an abstract way, its the balance of given space. It is this, the girl.
As children of this society, we look up to our elders for wisdom. And because of this, nothing shakes our confidence in them than the very absence of that wisdom.
We had an academy award winning director covering the topic of honour killings and shedding a much needed light in to its roots. Laws have been generated through brainstorming. High profile celebrities have been victims of this. Yet, it fails to end its streak.
I may be an educated person, to know whats wrong. Else, if too educated, would have quoted Descartes, and emphasized to comply with the norms of society. But, may be I am too educated to be indifferent to either side. So, nor do I believe in honour neither in love, but all I believe in, is sanctity of life. I believe in peace knowing that this world is build on chaos and has been in it for ages.
Thank goodness, this media of our does not represent our society, which is hideous as it already is. Intolerance, undetected, has settled down in our rows, and will grow ever stronger world wide if the trends are to be believed. The sickness will grow ever so strong and the ways of man will change for the worse. The only real enemy here, is our 'ego'. Ironically, it is core of the current versions of love and honour.
The truth is that these are nothing but himakat and nothing else.
Society is already too decomposed and the macabre reality partakes it down the drain.
P.s. To start curing this disease, a mass psychiatric evaluation is needed. This will lead to diagnosis and then... only then... we can look for submission of its exact cure from the experts!

Sunday, August 28, 2016

Depression aur Danishmandi!

The following is work of imagination that finds a lot of real life comparison
Study, my friend, is that love interest that never gives in. The one, you literally 'Try' to love, with all your mind and force your heart into it. But even then, it manages to make itself predictably, boring and dull.
My question here is: When you know, that you have spent 18 years of your life, running after the same bus, whats the solution?
The trouble is, your doubts over 'are there any solutions'?
May be one just tend to be a natural at it!
The consistent failures to love-your-academic-responsibilities has pushed me in this well of constant stress and apparent depression. Now folks, if you experience or empathize or relate to a heart ache in mirza sahiba kind of a story or a mann mayal like, I can understand that! you can understand that! This is because it is the 'usual' and 'normal' kind of heart's emotional pain. But, study's capacity to manoeuvre such peace altering skills is spellbounding and unexplainable, bewilderment.
What's worse is when people expect you to be a world class researcher by this time. Beta ap tou 18- 19 saal say parh rahay hou, ab tou aadat ho gayi hogi.. Yes! I am habitual but not about studying but running away from it.
And why not!? I mean what really is the image of these so-called helms/powerhouses of intellectual production aka universities? well, to be honest, it has nothing to do with neither brainstorming on original ideas nor objectivity of pursuing knowledge, but everything to do with mortal infatuation towards the affinitive species and the act carried out in line of sure ambitions, to attain the sacred bliss. This, in other words is called kutakhani according to our righteous teachers and pyaar-va-yar by our fellow mortals. So, it is all so evident that the apple can not fall far from such sort of tree!
Saying that, I don't mean myself as the contestant of this ubiquitous game, instead i am that apple that has been held mind air.
So whatever I do! These realities do not help my stakes, which keep on getting high, unchecked, unmonitored. By the time, I realize the ever-so-familier 'impending doom' I dive a bit deeper into this depression, nonetheless. 
This is not a class act, and survival from the last does not make me stronger for the next level. Just more familiar and a kind of deja vu-ish, to remember the last. My reflexes have now start twitching in anticipation, on what is to come.
In these ever so testing times when my parents want me to become a 'responsible citizen' and my teachers want me to become 'responsible researcher', all I see myself is becoming 'responsibly depressed' and eagerly wishing to become 'remarkably indifferent'.
The one medicine that had kept way my ever-so-expected, fall off-the-cliff, were my friends, but even they, like any other life saving medicine in this country, are far from reach or short in supply and any substitute is time and effort consuming, not to mention the risks and costs.
So here lies the runner-up of all trades!
P.s. ab koun uthay, phir say dil laga kar parhay, koi to rok lo...... yeh danishmandi ki galiya, in may phir say koi aur aye ga, aik din zaroor aye ga, par aaj nahi, ab himmat nahi yar - Ranjhanna MPhil

Sunday, August 21, 2016

Darkness aur Darna!

Disclaimer: the following post is a requital for the last masla-typo blog post... it is a return of the DARK SIDE! very very dark!! so brace yourselves, you just might wake some inner demons of yours.

The night was in, the life was dark. The time was stopping. The hopes were sailing away. I wish in times like these I could rescue my own soul. For when you wait for messiah, and lifeline, you are so in the mist of hanging in the sea, knowing nowhere to be.
So while I sit here in this high room from where I can look over the rest of this Capital city. There is no shred of any oversight, just despair. There are no rocks. The empty space inside is composed of the void that had to be created and it was an idea whose time had come. Pain my friend, I found you again on my side, dancing in this space with me.
Life was what I perceive of my own existence. It’s as hollow as the rainy day that arouse no emotion, that sunset that attracts no praise… its sadder than a survival run. And of this life, in its mysterious ways is so sarcastic, makes your losses a win and that win a loss, all lost in relative improvisation.
So, now while I sit in this room wondering about my life, the idea! It is not water, fire, dust or air, it is what it is, something I can’t fix in a bottle or possess in my pocket. I am its disciple. My desire is happiness and that my peace’s enemy. So I chose the darkness that leaves me with no hopes and lesser side effects.
Do I figure out my struggle? Oh believe me, there is a struggle! Always. It’s the monotony that I follow. Some night drive on empty roads, the moments abandoned by the rest of the society. I choose them, it is my specialty. It is a miserable sea, but the sail is mine, it is what I ‘like’ to be.
So, when you read this weird summary, a gross generalization, know this… I don’t expect anyone to comprehend or follow the logical chronology that is surely going to go unrecognized. It is a fate that I know already. Though, maybe, on some sentence, some level, we might connect to some extent.
So when I am going to end this, I write with no intent to defend. The reaching out the in world process is far out of my capacity to bear. While the world dissolves around me, there is nothing to be. Believe me I don’t care, I just can’t. I am sinfully indifferent, even to my own bland destruction.

p.s. reflecting on your existence is part of your individuality..
but to end on a positive note, remember in darkest of time, 
batti jalana na bholay! shamjdar kay liye ishara hi kafi hai! Darna mana hai!

Thursday, July 14, 2016

Honeymoon Aur Huma Mobin!

The girl who took internet by storm for turning a prospective tragedy into epic troll saga! Inspiring na!
Ok heres the thing. We all have come to know of this young married feisty girl from Karachi who has become an internet sensation overnight, coverage hailing from BBC to 9GAG, by which I mean she’s like all over the internet! Self caught in the acts of remorse over going on her honeymoon to Greece… ALONE!! This girl puts up the most romantic outcast showcase of her protest for her husband’s visa rejection. The feedback has come from all over the world… Starting from her character questions (mostly subcontinent), the ethical angle of caving into the husbandless honeymoon(again subcontinent), the ridiculity of going on such trip with her in-laws(mostly gora (Western/Europeans) people)?
Now, the girl, Huma Mobin, did come out in her explanation. What started as the Facebook share of a butch of holiday pics, turned into grilling-fest of horrendous remarks and alleges, post fame and highlight. Not to mention the memes. Huma nay to aag hum sab ko aag laga di hai! (Huma has set us all on fire!) 
In this process she made herself clear of few things:

1.    Its not her first honeymoon
First thing first, she had spent her first honeymoon with her husband, in Maldives and Dubai. So, don’t go all ‘HAWWW HAAYEEEE’('Oh my')-remark to something seen as scandalous- on her, as if she bailed on him, over very first sacred adventure. She bares no such blasphemous actions.
2.    She had planned a family package tour to Greece
Here we have an In-Laws loving eastern girl, a rare breed in herself, who takes her loved ones on the second honeymoon/travel adventure. This shows her enthusiasm and compassion, for traveling and her fellow travelers. So she did have chaperones, while complying with the eastern values, you know!
3.    There was an awful lot of CASH spent
And don’t we all know how much money goes into buying these tour packages to Europe. One must be crazy rich to give it up for nothing on a whim. So when you have grand amount of Quaids banking on a trip, it's a bad omen to let them down. YOU GO GIRL!!
4.    She had not anticipated her husband’s visa rejection
Then, comes the case of Mal-intent, well, she did not anticipate a rejection of visa, specifically not her husband's. Ironically the only doubts she had was hers, as she was ‘less traveled’.
5.    The Greek embassy’s lack of communication
The reason of visa rejection, being quoted, was the failure of Greek embassy to be able to contact the referrals submitted in visa application. So, all in all, it was a tragedy that needed a saving with a sweet ending. And don't we all relate to the pain of visa rejection, people. Show some unity here!
6.    Ja simran jee lay apni zindagi (Go on Simran live your life)
And while everyone on the internet who come from an oppressed place and bares an oppressed soul, blames her for leaving her husband in all this mayhem… well, it was him, her husband, who rise up to the occasion and said ‘Ja simran jeelay apni zindagi’ (Go on Simran live your life)-movie reference for freedom of girl in love- and thus, raised the bar for nice men in this country where misogyny is a well accepted norm.

So to be honest, in my sixteen years of internet, I have not seen such good publicity in my life time, in terms of whats trending globally related to Pakistan and not to forget, the much need depiction of the humans that live in this country. Although I have no right to say something positive about Huma, according to the current wave of internet brutality norms (pun intended) but here you go …. I am Proud of you Huma Mobin and, wish you and your husband, all the best for your future traveling adventures, may your visas never get rejected. Amen. 
P.s. and remember.. jalnay walay ka mou kala! (one who gets jealous has oneself disgraced)

Tuesday, June 28, 2016

Loss aur Likho apni kahani!

the tale of 'The Lost Faith in Mist of Living True to Yourself'
Join in on the factors of thinking the time shall be on our sides but you will be betrayed. Don’t worry, in this life, you have seen it before and you shall see it again. I am Life and I possess my own death, that I keep on seeping into the main bloodstream. I have aspiration that I cherish till the day I have to kill. These are the sacrifices that I have to make to get by.
What are the perceptions that will have their toll on the grown up; The pressure to be loved, to see your life worth the effort. Now you believe it. What options did you really have?!
The fact is the life is relative under pressure of constant comparison. I have to see my strengths, something beyond SWAT analysis. The reality is not someone’s property but you and I have to buy one’s own reality, on a lease. The day you lose your confidence, is the day you lose your reality. Try to get a new one, in this ever changing world.
I for most, have to look at what I do best. Kindda where have I spent most of my time… worrying, over-thinking… cant get a career out of them can i?!! But I, in silence, can work on the professional skill and expertise, with the literature I bought out of excitement.
All in all, I have the opportunity to live a life no one can afford to live. The life of a stoic. Now, I am not talking of the real selfless one, more like the one who has no other option, it is the hypocritical option. Bahi apna level hi bohat high hai, aur apni league to championship hai aur apni khawahish premier league ki Norwich whose preference is that of the standard of Manchester United or Liverpool.
While you prepare, you don’t have a warranty, life can shake and stir at any time, go out into thin air, disappear – WHOSSHH – gone! Just like that!
So dude! Apni tou life ki watt lag giye hai! Kiya bananay nikalay thay aur kidher aah gaye
The jack of most trades has to stick to his survival and grab hold of his attention span. Work his way out the midlife blues, and I am not even married yet and people so easily get on my nerves lately. Better get more sleep from now onwards.
This or that …. The English team is out of Euro as expected. Proud of this remorse over the inability English football team’s of achieving its potential, much like the reflection of my own life... Aab tou aadat si hai m******* ki!
And as far as current political instability, home and away, is concerned, I hate talking politics nowadays, either I am too aware now of my awareness or my dumbness or both! Or the world is too much of a beautiful chaos!
So my friend, enjoy life while you can.
P.s. dil ki darkan say likho apni kahani… jhoomo reh … hahaha … Noori song on the air!

Saturday, June 18, 2016

Report Card aur Ramazan!

Excitement in life is like McDonald's cheesy potatoes balls.. at first it seems all-tasty cheese filled crumcoat, but 3 to 4 bites down they loose the impact and taste like nothing but meshed potato.
Just gave one more bit of my exams, yet again. But I am not here to talk about the remorse of the same old shitty experience that one feels like running away from. What I am going to talk about is what it did to me. 
I am not opportunity-less man. I am bloody high on being lucky and near escapes. But to me its about getting to my potential, its more of what comes from the package of individuality, and not giving a fu*k about what the crowd identifies itself as or with.
My ever changing perception, evolved once again. Learning: Life is not about this shit or that shit, its the food mess where you always get served. So, you better develop a taste, or just get to extremes of liking food at highs and hating it on lows. It wont give you either pain or comfort, it will be what it is. 
You live in a world constructed to be at peace, but is growing intolerant ever since. Its a regression to towards the nature; miser, selfish and violent. So, if I feel passionate to save lives, it seems noble to me, especially, where life is about grabbing the objects that you fancy. To die, live and then die, for them, is all that takes over. 
In this overcrowded, intolerant and insecure society, which is at the same time compassionate, resilient and family-oriented, we are herd of desperate animals rebelling against each other. We want heaven and earth, all to ourselves, while we don't know shit.  
As, I discussed vehemently in my previous blogs.. now its proven that Pakistan's biggest obsession is MARRIAGE... getting an opportunity to consummating marriage, get hell bent on saving it in the long run and in the end, brag about cherishing its frights e.g. status of being a 'responsible' member of society, etc.
But my goal here is try to understand the bigger picture. 
Firstly, one derives strength from ones' race, gender, social and financial status of your parents, ethnic background and infrastructure around. Then secondly, the factors leading toward the kind of education you get from the schools and universities deemed fit for oneself, the 'Iyashi' opportunities one can afford, and then the two acting upon each other for the kind of job you wish to find. Alas, you are inhibited by the society due to their set norms and perceptions, your monetary restraints and life itself, with its mysterious serving of the same-shit-every-now-and-then. Thirdly comes, the epitome of one's life, the report card of your life, the thing! FAMILY, initially you have to get married to have one of your own!! work to keep it, and fill it with children, while you can and at the end get away with the credit of having 'the great learning'.
Feminism, an important part of today's culture, I hail it! though it was chained and shackled by one's personal and family reputation, prospects of harassment,  and opposition from our indigenous traditions. While the men on the other side, were facing lesser evils of falling in to inferior company of lesser intellects, drug access, immorality, and physical beating as a result of being overly expressive. Though, both girls and boys, can still decide, to great extent toward their education and job, but they don't get a 1/3 of that support when it comes to marriage. This is how grave it gets. And if ever you are none compliant, you are dead!
Now, sitting in this wicker chair, sipping my americano that tastes like a jalli-huwi coffee, still managing to make it up with the bitterness that I as of recently related to my life, is what life is serving tonight anyway. I for now will keep on pushing to improve my life and my understanding, so should anyone enlighten enough to realize all this, should too.Though, its Ramazan, I do wish for a pakora, but the coffee house is too cool for that, wonder what life thinks!
p.s. Saal kay 11 mahenay hum coffee pay nahi aisay martay, jese iss ramazan kay mahenay mein hum aik Pakoray par martay hai!!

Saturday, April 9, 2016

Pebbles aur Pashtun!

So we are now overgrown children. Still picking petty fights. Running away from taking responsibility for our actions. Not doing the right things.... Well, don't get me wrong. I 'likes' this. The thing is, like many others, I do what really 'feels' good. hum feelings lenay walay log hai...
Let me explain it. If I have 3 research articles to read and there is a Game of Thrones novel on the table. My choice or bad choice, I'll pick GoT anytime! Its better escaping into the land beyond the wall, than the lab beyond-the-facilities-you-could-ever-imagine-to-be-in-your-institute (it's simply too depressing).
Thing is, it's not bad to be an overgrown child either. Because you too have a dream and a potential to achieve it. In this ever changing world, your peers might not understand your 'feeling wala behaviour', what matters is that you do believe in it. See the positives in your society.
So, the other day I was at a traffic signal on Kashmir Highway in Capital. There, I saw this shaven head pashtun child of about 7 years of age, wearing a grey-green shalwar kalmeez, which seemed to be washed a week ago. He was sitting at the corner end of 'the green' divider. And the kid had a few pebbles in his hand that he used for aiming at the traffic signal pool.
To my surprise he was pretty good at it. As he swung his hand from a lower angle and release the pebble, it struck the iron work at 3 meter reach, full toss!
What amazed me more was, down under this sunny day and dry breeze, all by himself, the kid took some 'feeling' out of this game of striking pools with pebbles.
What I just illustrated in almost 5 lines, actually happen in 5 seconds.
As the cars stopped at the signal. The kid dropped those pebbles and grabbed a box of ball-pens, and acted in a very pampered manner, as if he was their relative's child asking them to support his new venture of selling ball-pens. He was motivated and proud, and I was impressed enough to buy a ball-pen!
One of the most essential skill is the ability to sell ideas, in times like these, what's even better is, if those ideas are solutions for the challenges faced by masses. If that is so then, your rebel self will find a lot of passion in surviving this world. And remember to not hate someone for their ambition when its your turn.
P.s. remember when reconstructing your 'improved self' do put up a sign board 'taqleef kay liye mazrat-khuwa hai!' for all those who would not understand your 'feeling wala attitude'

Saturday, March 12, 2016

Glossy aur Gham!

We love cars, those shinny, glossy, metaloplastic, running horses. They only fart and don’t poop. And we made all types of roads for them, 5 feet roads, two-way roads, highways and motorways, for them. Indeed, the hobbies that we keep, have come with a great cost. All in the name of transporting us in our times of need and of leverage luxury.
We love violence. There is always a share of hatred that we have kept for our enemies. We have our dreams, the ones about annihilating them, obliterating them, these are the ones we cherish and keep close to our hearts. So, we have spent wholeheartedly getting our expensive tools for raising such havoc. When the moment comes, we just like to brag about their destruction capacity, aimed at ruining those few human beings who make us insecure.
We love successful, attractive, subservient, human beings who are equally oppressed, and share similar voids in their existence. The indulgence of such liberties have a price, sometimes its fate-associated and sometimes it hedges on, money or power – associated dynamics, and the desired outcome is the envy of the common folks. We have all sorts of versions of this one: family, companionships and/or agreements.
We love food. The gluttony and its access, the delicacies of taste, the measures of fulfillment, the ecstasy of having to eat what others can’t afford, monetarily , socially, culturally or religiously. Whether in the name of health or distress, we have our personal reasons.
We love sports. The adrenaline packed spectacle, which somehow catches our total attention. The game, the players, they are our fascination and affection. The mental, physical and spiritual capacity of the player is the base of the game. The sacred association to a team becomes the part of the rhetorical stance of one’s belief. We shame, we blame, we cheer, and we share, all in its name. 
Oh, you happiness! What do you do to us!
What we don’t really love much are our rights, our education and our health. We don’t strive for them as long as they do not interfere with the love of our lives that we share, as above.
Fact is that our government does not really care about meaningfully educating the masses. Masses are not really that interested spending on quality education and by quality education I mean, to learn what really works in life and how the life works.
Now to talk about health, well, it is more of a commodity. Quality-wise difference depends upon, who has got the money and access and who has not. Health is not just a diagnosis of what's wrong with you but it is also the knowledge of what is right for you.
Then comes the thing that matter the most! To know what rights you have in the communities that you live in, what are the rights which were anointed upon you at birth, blah, blah, blah.. Now the thing about a right is that it only exists if you know it. Knowledge of it is one fact that’s equally important to having it, because if you don't know what your right is then definitely you might be debarred from it!
P.s. this is the poetry that inspired this post:
Aaj ke gham ke naam (In the name of this day’s sorrow:)
Aaj ka gham ke hai zindagi ke bhare gulistan se khafa (Sorrow that stands, disdaining the blossoming garden of Life,)
Zard patton ka ban (Like a forest of dying leaves)
Zard patton ka ban jo mera des hai (A forest of dying leaves that is my country)
Dard ki anjuman jo mera des hai (An assembly of pain that is my country)
- Faiz Ahmed Faiz

Muzaffarabad aur manzar!

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